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Submitted on
March 20, 2013
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Like a sparrow, you perch; toes curled and brown eyes wide, arms tinted blue with cold. In my haste to reach you I trip upon your shoes, tiny little things still drizzle-damp and abandoned at the door.

         "What are you doing?!"

         Your legs stretch for summers as you stand, dress billowing from you like a white flag of surrender.

         "Ava, come inside. Come inside. Please."

         You stare past my outstretched hands and step away—a sparrow, caught in a downdraft.
A little something for a dismal day.
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:iconeclaire291:
eclaire291 Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
This is language at its best. You have woven words together to make something beautiful and heartbreaking. The theme of the subject being a sparrow is such an interesting visual. As you described, I see sparrows as fragile and that terrifying conclusion is done so well in this poem. The way the rain makes the subject vulnerable and the way the narrator comes to that realization is chilling.

Great work!

If you don't mind me asking, do you take inspiration from any poets in particular?
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:iconconcora:
Concora Featured By Owner Jun 21, 2013   Writer
My goodness, thank you so much! You've made my day with such a wonderful comment. I'm glad that this piece was able to intrigue you so. :heart:

Honestly, I don't actually read a lot of poetry off dA, with the exception of e.e. cummings - I don't think he had much of an influence here, though. :)
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:iconflummo:
flummo Featured By Owner Mar 31, 2013  Student Writer
"Your legs stretch for summers as you stand, dress billowing from you like a white flag of surrender." :heart: :clap:
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:iconconcora:
Concora Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2013   Writer
:heart: :huggle:
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:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Mar 21, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
beautiful imagery
especially Your legs stretch for summers as you stand, dress billowing from you like a white flag of surrender.
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:iconconcora:
Concora Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013   Writer
Thank you very much. :)
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:icon0hgravity:
0hgravity Featured By Owner Mar 22, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
^^
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